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 My name is Cochino and this is my story…
I was born in the mountains of Guadalupe, and as a small piglet I grew up in an orphanage in the small town of Chiapas, and at a very young age I was forced to work in the coffee trade of Soconusco.
It was there that I met Pablo Sanchez, who was older and had been working for the Valdez Coffee Cartel for most of his life. Working from dawn until after sunset side by side we became very good friends. One hot day we made a pact that we would stick together and find a better life, away from Soconusco.
One chilly February morning before sunrise we decided to begin our journey out of Soconusco. With our trusty burrow Esteban, we headed out with just the clothes on our backs and the hope of finding a better life in Tijuana.
Heading northwest, we stopped in Tabasco and found work in the local coffee trade to earn some pesos so we could continue northward. Pablo worked the fields and I was making deliveries to the local merchants. One day while making a delivery of what I thought was sugar, I found myself on the wrong side of the law. The local sheriff was getting suspicious and we decided to make a hasty exit from Tabasco. I was a wanted piglet. I hid in Esteban’s saddlebag and our journey continued.
| Entering Tijuana, as a pig, I thought that I had found my new home. Unfortunately the federales were on my trail and I knew I was putting my friends in jeopardy. Once again I was forced to hide in Esteban’s saddlebag. I convinced Pablo to trade the saddlebags (with me still inside) to an American biker named Apehanger from Arizona, Apehanger had agreed to get Pablo a California driver’s license and bus fare to San Diego. I will miss my friends.
Riding in Apehanger’s saddlebag was louder but much faster than Esteban’s. Once across the border Apehanger decided we were going to Florida to something they call “Bike Week”. At Bike Week I met many other people who looked like Apehanger. From what I remember I had a great time. On the last day of Bike Week Apehanger met up with his old friend “Trashcan”. Apehanger and Trashcan were throwing back a couple of cold ones and decided that they would make a trade, Trashcan would get the saddlebags (with me inside) in exchange for Apehanger agreeing to taking Trashcan’s X ol’ lady back to Arizona, or anywhere he wants, just as long as it was away from Trashcan.
Over the next couple of months, Trashcan and I traveled the open highway, from town to town and bar to bar we drank our way north to another bike week, this time in a place called Myrtle Beach. It was there in Myrtle Beach I met the most beautiful pot-bellied pig I have ever laid eyes on. It was love at first sight; “Jezabelle” was from a place called New Hampshire.
It was time for this pig to make his own way in life. With two more days left at Myrtle Beach, I told Trashcan about my feelings for Jezabelle, he told me the story of his X old’ lady and to take care of myself.
Jezebelle worked with a couple of bikers who sold “Pig Snot”. The bikers, Skid Mark and Wetspot offered me a job, with dollar signs in their eyes, a deal was struck. In this business two pigs are better than one. We loaded up the van and headed for Laconia.
Before we got to Laconia we had to stop at a couple of bike shops to make some sales. It was at one of these bike shops, Manchester H-D, that things took a turn for the worse. Once again I found myself on the wrong side of the law. It would seem Skidmark, Wetspot and Jezabelle were wanted on some insider trading charges. I was all alone again in a very unfamiliar place.
Just then when I thought all hope was lost a man named Stephen walked up to me. He was the owner of Manchester Harley-Davidson and he asked if I needed any help. I told him of my journey and how the love of my life was gone. Stephen a kind, generous, giving, loving man took me in like one of his own.
He brought me into the dealership, what a beautiful place it was. New Harley® bikes as far as the eye could see, a huge assortment of parts and accessories. There was enough clothing to clothe the entire orphanage I had grown up in. He fed me like a king, cleaned me up and gave me some new Harley duds. I was introduced to the staff; they were all very friendly and knowledgeable.
Steve, the General Manager, took me through their service department. There were Harleys in all states of repair, motor work, frame changes and tune ups. These guys really had their act together. He introduced me to Tim, the Parts Manager, he reminded me of my long lost brother. He was a much bigger pig than I was. Tim suggested that I, Chocino T. Pig come to work at M.H.D. as their webmaster. All the managers agreed to this idea and I was offered the position.
Could this be my destiny? Me a webmaster? I would give my all!! I accepted the offer.
And that my friend is my story.
Stay tuned for further adventures…
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